"Life is what happens to you while you are busy making other plans"
~ John Lennon
I have truly come to understand the meaning of this with a recent turn of events that had taken place in my very own life.
Till now, we used this line lightly, when superficial plan didn't go as per our liking, or we had to make peace with things we didn't get etc etc. But recently, I thought that I had finally overcome a few hurdles in life. Mentally, emotionally, physically and otherwise... Felt like things were finally getting back on track. I was joining back work, something I was unsure of in my journey for so long. Longing to be back in the company of people I enjoyed being around. Working, learning, doing so much more. Friends getting married! Weddings to attend. So much travel on my agenda...! :) So much good coming my way. I was truly at peace to see hose my life seemed to looking more and more perfect on paper! :) And I for one, jumped in head first! Over excited about work! :) Happy to be back! Attended the first friends wedding! Super excited...
Till the day I had a series of blackouts. A week of trying to figure out what went wrong and a zillion tests later, we came to know that I had a few things off inside of me, most importantly, that the lining of my heart has some inflammation, causing some restriction of space from time to time. Nothing too serious, nothing to worry about. Nothing some LONG term medication wont solve. However... I am going to need to take rest for 3 months (if not more) and live a calm normal stress free life till I'm better.
For anyone who knows me, even a little, can understand the meaning of the last line of the previous paragraph...
Anyway... There are many ways I can approach this. Be upset and angry about it. Because all my plans in life have been thrown off course... OR be grateful! Grateful that I'm alive, didn't drop dead. Grateful that no matter the seriousness, I have something that is curable and fixable with some serious heavy duty meds... Grateful that maybe something worse was meant to happen and this is just a smaller form of repentance.
Another way of looking at it... A friend told me... "Rhea, God saved your life this year. There has to be something in return done for that. This is maybe what you need to go through for him saving your life" That too can be so true. They say, 'kuch paane ke liye kuch khone padta hai"
Another thing was, that God is recharging me battery. I am one of his lucky few he does this to. :) Duracel batteries in me are getting recharged! :) So I will be up and running as soon as they finish charging. Hopefully they dont take too long. I'll be all ready as new and good to go! ;)
I have family and friends who love me dearly, some of which are even angry at God. For putting me through this. And I beg them to look at it differently. Never be angry at God. If he puts you to it, he will ensure that he will see you through it. There is a reason for everything that happens in life. No matter how much we feel like we make our own destiny and our own life, people need to understand that what is written is what will happen. The earlier we learn to accept this the better.
There is no better way to explain this. My situation is a perfect example. After contemplating going back to work, everything was sitting perfectly for me to go back to work. Everything is ready and set. And this has now changed course for me.
I had planned to travel to New Zealand for over a year. Tickets were bought a year ago, itineraries had been planned for the past 6 months or more now... No one knew I'd be cancelling my tickets 3 DAYS before the date I had to fly out...
A load of my closest friends are getting married. One after the other. I was to attend all weddings... In my very own city... and now... I cannot attend even one of them...
I am not upset, or angry. I know everything happens for a reason, and I am meant to go through this for whatever reason... But it sure has changed my view on certain things. More so to prove, what is meant to happen, destined to happen... will happen. And there is nothing you or I will be able to do about it. Life is so much easier to accept and live happily if you start understand these codes of life and the universe. The earlier the better... :)
With all my love, to all who read what I write! :)
Rhea*
